Looking Back
by MoonytheMarauder1
Summary: Sirius has never had a place to call home—not until he meets a certain werewolf. Squib!AU Homeless!AU Fluffy Wolfstar


**A/N: Hey y'all! This was written for Hogwarts. Other Prompts are listed below. :)**

 **Muggle Music Task 5: Write about someone doing something charitable**

 **Word Count: 2408**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Those rights go to JK Rowling.**

 **Enjoy!**

The wind was blowing steadily all around him, and Sirius huddled in on himself. His fingertips were turning blue, and he couldn't stop shivering. He'd lost track of exactly how long he'd been out there, stealing food from rubbish bins and sleeping under bridges—it had been more than a year, that was for sure. And now winter was fast approaching, and he wasn't sure how he'd survive it.

He stared down at his hands in frustration. Only one of them was gloved, and even that was missing a finger. He balled his hands into fists. If he'd only had magic like the rest of his family, then he could produce a flame to warm himself. He wouldn't be in this mess.

But things just weren't that easy, were they?

Sirius leaned against the side of a building. He was tucked away from sight in a narrow alley, they way he liked to be. No one could bother him there.

Sometimes, though, when night fell and the temperature dropped with it, he dreamed that a boy would come to take him home. A boy with the same grey eyes that he had, with a sharper nose, and smaller hands—

"No," he muttered to himself. "He isn't here. Reg's not here. He isn't coming."

Sirius ran a hand through his long, dark hair. He'd once taken so much pride in keeping it perfect, but now it was matted, dirty, and in bad need of a wash. It felt disgusting; _he_ felt disgusting.

What sort of Black didn't have magic?

Sirius closed his eyes. Tomorrow was a new day, he reminded himself. And as cold as the night was, the sun always rose again to warm the earth a few degrees.

With that thought, he drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

When Sirius awoke, it was still dark out. The stars were still hanging in the sky, and the moon was still burning bright. It took him a moment to realize that he'd been woken by a hand on his shoulder.

He flinched away, expecting it to be some sort of Muggle officer trying to take him to a home—or worse, a Ministry official wanting to know why the eldest Black son was out on the streets in Muggle London.

His visitor was neither of those things, however. She was smiling kindly at him, curly grey hair tumbling to her shoulders.

"Hello, dear," she said softly. "My name's Euphemia Potter. What are you doing all the way out here? Where are your parents?"

Fear seized Sirius' heart, and he leaned away from the woman. "They're not—I mean, I don't—"

"All right, dear," she murmured, obviously sensing that it was a touchy subject. "You don't have to tell me. But please come with me—my husband and I run a shelter for those like you in the winter months, a place to rest and get some food. You don't have to come, of course, but I would like you to. You can stay as long as you wish."

Sirius hesitated. He didn't know this woman, but her offer was more than appealing. He glanced down at his raggety clothes and thought about how his flesh stung from the biting winds. Even if it was just for the remainder of the night… he wanted to go.

"Okay," he rasped, his voice hoarse from disuse. "I'll come. I'm Sirius, by the way."

He didn't offer his last name—Euphemia was wearing a Hufflepuff scarf around her neck, and he didn't want her to make the connection that he wasn't just some Muggle.

She smiled. "Come on, then, Sirius. Let's get you warmed up."

He followed her through the streets silently, until at last they reached a humble building that Sirius couldn't help but smile at.

"My family and I live above the shelter," Euphemia told him, "so people usually only go up there in an emergency. I'll show you to your room. Breakfast is at eight-thirty, and I'll set out some clean clothes for you to change into."

She dropped him off outside of a door, and Sirius turned just as she was beginning to walk away.

"Thank you," he said.

Euphemia turned and smiled. "Of course, dear. Now, you get some rest."

* * *

Breakfast was chaos.

Sirius barely managed to get to one of the small tables in the dining room to snag a plate. There were many more people than he expected, and they all seemed to have the appetite of a dog—and the manners of one too. This wasn't true of all of them, of course—mostly just the boys his age.

It was a hot meal, though, and Sirius was determined—he elbowed his own way through, sitting down with a prize of hot eggs and toast. He was rather pleased with himself.

"Tea?"

Sirius looked up from his plate to see a brown-haired boy about his age holding out a tea kettle and cup.

Dumbly, Sirius nodded. The boy smiled and quickly poured a cup, before handing it to Sirius.

"Are you new here?" the boy asked. "Euphemia mentioned that she'd brought in someone new."

Sirius nodded, not sure how to react. "Yeah. I'm Sirius."

The boy's amber eyes sparkled as he said, "I'm Remus. Remus Lupin. I work here during school holidays, so you might see quite a bit more of me."

Sirius nodded, taking a sip of the tea. It was quite hot, but it soothed some of his nerves. "Where do you go to school?" he asked, a hunch forming.

Remus pulled out a chair and sat down. "A boarding school in Scotland," he replied promptly. "Tiny little thing. Not many have heard of it."

Sirius raised an eyebrow. That was a standard response when wizards believed they were talking to Muggles, to protect the Statue of Secrecy. "Hogwarts, then?"

Remus blinked in surprise, then laughed. "Yeah. Are you a wizard, then? I don't remember seeing you in school."

Sirius shook his head softly. "Nah." He swallowed thickly. He didn't normally tell anyone this, but he wanted to get everything out in the open. If he was going to stay here, he needed to know that he'd be accepted. He thought there was a good chance that they would be fine with him, since they took in Muggles, but he was still nervous. "I'm a Squib."

Remus nodded in understanding. His eyes were curious. "That's not… that's not why you're out here, is it?" His eyes widened suddenly. "You don't have to answer that, if it's too personal."

Sirius laughed a little, the sound startling him—he hadn't laughed since he'd run away from home when he was sixteen. He didn't feel uncomfortable telling Remus—there hadn't been any judgement in the other boy's eyes, and Sirius decided to take a leap of faith.

"Yeah," he admitted, "that's why I'm out here. My name is Sirius Black. My parents… weren't so happy that I didn't inherit their gifts."

Remus frowned thoughtfully. Sirius noticed three long scars across his jaw, and wondered how Remus had gotten them. He sensed, however, that now was not the time to ask.

"You're lucky, in a way," Remus murmured. "You might not be able to be a part of the light magic… but you can't be a part of the dark magic, either."

Sirius tilted his head to the side. "It could still affect me," he pointed out.

Remus nodded in agreement. "Yes. But it can't be associated with you."

Euphemia called Remus away then, and Sirius was left to wonder about the boy in the woolen jumper.

* * *

"I love this time of year," Remus told him excitedly a week later.

Sirius frowned s he looked out the window. "Why? It's just cold."

He and Remus were sitting in the sitting room of the Potters', watching the snow fall outside. Sirius had to admit that the past few days had been nice. He felt guilty taking advantage of the Potters' generosity, and had taken to helping Remus with his chores. Remus had learned not to protest, and the two had made a lot of progress. Sirius had noticed, however, that his friend was getting peakier. He hoped that he wasn't overworked. In fact, it was due to Sirius' prompting that they were taking this hot chocolate break right now.

Remus laughed. "It's not that. Everyone tries to be better during the holidays, you know? Everyone comes together."

Sirius took a sip of his hot chocolate, skeptical. That wasn't how his family was at all. Although, he was beginning to see the Potters as more of his family than his blood relatives.

Remus wasn't his family. He was something else entirely, and Sirius couldn't quite put his finger on it.

Remus caught his look. "Well, they do here, anyway," he corrected himself. "And I like seeing that. There just aren't many reasons for people to want to better themselves anymore."

Sirius wasn't sure that was strictly true. He was pretty sure that it wasn't the holidays that had brought him there—just Euphemia's kindness. And it wasn't the holidays that were encouraging Sirius to give back to the Potters, either—it was the boy in front of him.

"Why do you volunteer here?" Sirius asked suddenly.

Remus glanced over at him in surprise, his drink sloshing around in its mug. "Er… I dunno. It feels right, I guess. I met James at Hogwarts, he mentioned this place… it just feels like home."

"So you're just helping people because you want to?" Sirius asked, double checking what he suspected.

Remus looked mystified. "Well, yeah."

Sirius shook his head in wonder. "You really don't know how good you are, do you?"

"What? Plenty of people—"

"Most people wouldn't do this," Sirius told him.

Remus regarded him quietly. "Well, maybe you just haven't met the right kind of people."

Sirius grinned and threw an arm around Remus' shoulders. "I don't need to meet anyone else. I have you. Unless you decide to leave me, of course." He turned to Remus, his smiled wavering. "But you'll always be here, Remus, won't you?"

Remus face turned a bit red, but his eyes sparkled with warmth. "Yes, Sirius," he said softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

Sirius felt strangely pleased.

* * *

"You really shouldn't be smoking, you know."

Sirius turned to where Remus was leaning against the door frame of his bedroom, smirking.

Sirius sighed. "I know. But it's calming."

Remus' nose wrinkled cutely. "It smells."

"Wonderful," Sirius added with a grin.

Laughing and rolling his eyes, Remus came over and plucked the cigarette from his friend's fingers, taking a long drag. Sirius had ended his role as a resident of the shelter and had begun working with Remus there instead. When Remus was away at Hogwarts, though he'd graduated that past year, Sirius was helping out Euphemia and working at his uncle's store. As it turned out, Uncle Alphard couldn't care less that Sirius had no magical gift.

"Hypocrite," Sirius accused.

Remus' grin was wicked. "At your service." His smile faded, and Sirius' grey eyes narrowed concernedly. "Sirius, I… I have something to tell you."

Sirius put a hand on Remus' arm. "We've known each other for a year, mate. You can tell me anything."

Remus drew away, running a hand through his hair, his face ashen. "I… I'm a werewolf, Sirius."

Sirius didn't say anything, shocked. This hadn't been what he was expecting.

"I'm sorry," Remus whispered. "I should have told you sooner, but I was scared, and… Sirius?"

Sirius was suddenly aware that he was laughing. He didn't know why; this wasn't funny in the least… But had Remus really thought he'd be angry? He'd never hurt him before, so why should he now?

"Remus, I'm not upset. I don't care. You don't care that I'm a Squib," he pointed out.

Remus collapsed on Sirius' bed, groaning as his head dropped into his hands. "This is different, though. I'm dangerous, Sirius."

Sirius nodded solemnly. "I know. I've seen you on hot chocolate days. You always manage to get a mug."

Remus scowled. "This isn't a joke, Sirius."

Sirius snapped his jaw shut, apologetic. He sat next to Remus and put an arm around his shoulders. "I know," he muttered, "but you're safe with me."

Remus leaned against him, and Sirius felt his heart flutter in his chest.

"Thanks, Sirius."

Sirius smiled. "Of course, mate. Of course."

The next week, Sirius waited anxiously for Remus to get back from the airport. He'd been visiting his parents in Wales, and should have been back two hours ago. Sirius was growing worried. What i something had happened to Remus? What if the Ministry had figured out his secret and taken him, or the Muggle police had picked him up for doing some sort of wizard-y thing? Deep down, he knew these things were unlikely, but he couldn't help but distrust those authority figures because of the time he spent on the streets.

Thankfully, his fears were proved unfounded when the door to the shelter opened. Remus stumbled inside, covered in snow. His face was partially covered by his red and gold Gryffindor scarf, and his ears and nose were pink from the cold. He seemed unharmed, but with that man, who could be sure?

"There you are!" Sirius exclaimed, rushing over. "What took so long?"

Remus shook the snow out of his hair, and Sirius' heart did a funny flip in his chest. "First the flight was delayed, and then there was a lot of traffic. Sirius? Are you okay?"

"I was worried about you," Sirius babbled. "Maybe I shouldn't've been, but I was, and—"

Remus' cold fingers touched his cheek. Sirius' breath hitched, and Remus seemed surprised but pleased with himself.

"Is this okay?" he asked softly.

Sirius closed the distance between them, capturing Remus' lips with his own. He shivered, but not from the coldness of Remus' skin. The kiss was quick and chaste, but it made Sirius happier than nearly anything else in his life had.

He pulled away. "I think I know why I was so worried."

Remus snorted. "Idiot."

Sirius grinned. "Maybe. But you know, you could always make up for it."

Remus raised an eyebrow. "Oh? How's that?"

Sirius' eyes sparkled. "We can share a blanket and watch a movie," he suggested.

Remus unwound his scarf from his neck. "I'd like that."

Ten minutes later, with a mug of hot chocolate and a werewolf snuggled against his side, Sirius finally felt at home.

 **A/N: Prompts:**

 **Advent Calendar: Day 1: Squib!AU**

 **Writing Club:**

 **Character Appreciation: 12. (object) a cup of tea**

 **Disney Challenge: Songs 2. Be Our Guest — Write about a character welcoming someone into their home**

 **Book Club: Nobody Owens — (emotion) lonely, (plot point) running late, (dialogue) "But you'll always be here, [Name], won't you?"**

 **Showtime: 22. Over the Moon — (phrase) leap of faith**

 **Amber's Attic: Songs 3. Fuck Tha Police by N. W. A.: Write about having issues with someone of authority. (5 point bonus)**

 **Count Your Buttons: AU 2. Homeless!AU, Objects 1. Hot chocolate, Dialogue 2. "I love this time of year.", Words 4. Excited**

 **Lyric Alley: 9. Christmas time, just let them ring in peace**

 **Em's Emporium: 2. Holiday Music: (word) chaos**

 **Liza's Loves: 3. Write about falling for someone you work with**

 **Angel's Arcade: 8. Luz — (time) nighttime, (action) smoking, (title) Looking Back**

 **Bex's Basement: 12. Liza—Write a fluffy Wolfstar**

 **December Fortnightly Challenges:**

 **6\. (word) safe**


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